Dis…

Disrespect. Disappointment. Dissatisfaction. Disillusionment. Distrust. Discouragement. Disenfranchisement. So many disses. So many reasons for many of us to be moved to action. And I’ll bet you can think of a slew of moments in the last two years that generated at least one of these feelings. I know I can. Too many to count in fact. And every single one of those outrageous moments was accompanied by an angry image of the man who has hijacked our democracy and the minions who serve him instead of serving our nation and people.

And yet this weekend I had an experience that has pushed all of those moments aside with such a sudden epiphany I was nearly blinded when the light finally went on. I was phone banking for the TDP this weekend and I spoke with a gentleman in El Paso who agreed with our value statements but when I asked if we could count on him to vote for democrats he responded, no way… he’d take a pass on that. I was stunned. But he then he went on to share that in ten years no one had ever asked what his concerns were or what his people needed. Even when he asked Beto’s team to canvass his neighborhood, they didn’t. And so he felt that we cared about his vote but not about him.

All the disses filled my head and I felt embarrassed that we had been the source of his disappointment, his distrust and his disenfranchisement. Even while he aligned with us – he would stay home because we hadn’t shown he was important. As we talked, I asked if he’d considered becoming involved and explained that if no one was asking him, then it was all the more important for him to speak up until he was heard. He didn’t know how to do that. He didn’t know that’s how it worked. He didn’t realize he had that option or that he could become deputized to help his neighbors vote. Because he was in an area that no one had asked or suggested or educated, he had no idea. In the end, he asked me to have someone local reach out to him and I’m certain they will. But the story isn’t just about him, it’s about the realization that we lost in 2016 because there are so many like him that we’ve neglected.

When we talk about mobilizing the base – we call or knock and read scripts. We talk at people not with them. We ask them to volunteer but we don’t really talk about how that means they can use their voices to affect their lives and affect change in our society. We usually just talk about how much we need their help for candidates or a cause. Bodies in shift slots for the greater good. But what about their good?

After the call ended I realized that I was embarrassed not just that the Democratic Party had neglected that man and taken him for granted; but that as a leader in this community I had been guilty of that as well. That in my smug, confident way I was certain that we were so right in our beliefs that of course they’d all want be with us. It’s in their self-interest after all. But all those disses? We cause them as much as they do and you know which “they” I mean. And to my mind it’s so much worse when we do it. Why? Because as democrats we are the party of inclusion; of hope; of love who you want to love. We are the party that takes care of humanity; who wants fair wages, healthcare and a social contract of equality. And we are the party that cries for unity. And yet we expect our people to meet us where we stand because we think we’re so much better than the alternative. We ask them to walk in our shoes instead of walking in theirs. And with that realization came the other – that this is how he won. He bothered to speak to them even if his words were lies. He showed up even when his appearance was a false. He gave them the hope we failed to deliver even while it will never bear fruit.

I still believe all those things about us by the way. That we are the real hope that will deliver. But we have to stop talking at people and start talking with them. We have to show them that their voice matters and teach them how to use it. This is the path to fixing what went wrong in 2016; and what is continuing to go wrong. It’s the way we succeed – one conversation at a time.

With respect and admiration
Debby Roseman, President, Katy Area Democrats